The Break-Up
by MariedeFrance
Summary: "'I feel strange. Do you feel strange' she wondered aloud. He thought about it for less than a minute but had to admit he had no better way of describing it either. He nodded. 'So, what do you want to do now? [...]'"
1. The Beginning

It was a mild Saturday evening. The day had been filled with the sound of tape being wrapped around boxes and "Do you want this?"-questions. The fruit of their labor lay stacked around them. In the center on the fluffy, elaborate rug Tenten had picked out, the two of them sat. He with his legs traditionally folded underneath him, she with hers casually crossed. He was having a glass of scotch, she was enjoying a full-bodied red.

"I think I should get it", she was saying. Her hair was not quite sweaty but it did not have that fluffy dryness it took on after she blow-dried it too long. It was somewhere in between and matched the color of her eyes as they sparkled with teasing.

He did not reply, but his firm grip on the Louis XIII de Remy Martin Black Pearl Grande Champagne Cognac Brandy imported from France made it clear he would need more arguments from her. Carefully but without leaving any doubt about her resolution, she placed her strong tanned fingers below his.

"You are not an easy person to live with." Her gaze was as steady as a long-term alcoholic's.

The twist of his head indicated he was not unswayable. It was an undeniable argument. Still, his hands would not release the bottle neck. He could not let it go.

As she shifted her weight to hold onto what both of them wanted, she bumped into one of the boxes marked "Weapons, Tenten". The thought of how he would never see this box or its contents displayed in their bedroom again scraped the inside of his mind as it slowly flowed into memories of their past. With their fingers only millimeters apart the sensation of a shared past intensified.

The sun was shining onto their heads as concentration grew more difficult. The large clearing in the middle of the woods surrounding all their home, the village of Konoha, should have provided ample room for both training groups. Sitting by the edge of it, almost blanketed by shadows sat sixteen-year old Neji, eyes closed, back straight. While Tenten, his training partner, hovered hidden in the leaves above him, he was supposed to use his sight to locate her. But his eyes stayed shut due to his increasing annoyance with Lee's newest training partner. Formerly, Lee, Tenten and Neji had been a well-oiled if counterintuitive team of three. Both Tenten and Neji had gotten used to Lee's antics: He favored a green jumpsuit and energetic battle cries. But his most recent endeavor was beyond their understanding. A young woman from the village, which Lee obviously had a crush on, had asked for training. She was very vocal.

The effort it took to concentrate on learning a complicated technique was heavily inconvenienced by the newcomer's frequent shouts of "Ouch!", "Not so hard!", and "How'd you do that?!" After Neji had failed to locate Tenten by the time thirty minutes had passed, she elegantly swung herself off the branch, hanging by one hand for a second, then dropping to her feet. Heavy weaponry rattled as she walked over and knelt next to him. They shared an exasperated sigh, silently agreed to choose a different training time in the future.

There was nothing much else to do but watch the other two in their efforts to train. Sakura was a rather pretty girl, only a year younger than them, and her quest to improve her fighting skills would have been very commendable if it had not been for the sake of a boy. Not a man. Not great love. A boy she liked from school. It almost seemed too straight-forward to be true.

Tenten did have to admit that Sasuke, the object of Sakura's affection, was very dreamy. Lilly-white skin offset with deep, dark, heavily lashed eyes. Neji could not have cared if Sasuke's kiss could cure cancer. He would never understand people's fascination with their feelings. Tenten wondered whether she should try and explain but one look at her sparing partner's impassive face as he watched the vision of Sakura with her light hair and ebony skin perform acrobatic-like moves less than three meters away gave her an inkling of the undertaking's furtiveness.

What she eventually settled with was: "Some people actually like feeling things."

He shrugged and Tenten rolled her eyes. But she did it with a smile.

When Lee finally released the girl from his overenthusiastic claws, she got up from her chaffed knees, panting heavily and made her way over to Tenten, who was holding out a bottle of water for her.

"It gets easier," Tenten promised, who was partly talking about the hard training and partly about Lee's demeanor. He was doing lunges and laughing about life or youth or something in the background.

Neji made no such comment.

Grateful, Sakura accepted the beverage and took a few long gulps before she replied.

"In any case, it will be worth it," she assured them. As she sat down, Sakura brushed her beautiful hair out of her face and inadvertently smeared dirt all over it. Tenten contemplated telling her, but decided not to would be more fun.

"So, Sakura…," Tenten began. She was leaning back on her elbows, legs outstretched and enjoying the last rays of sunshine. "How can you be so sure it'll be worth it?"

Sakura smiled. Her eyes shone with delight. She got to talk about her sweetheart. Tenten wondered what it would feel like to be in love.

"Some people are worth fighting for."

It was a good answer, Tenten decided.

Her reply was: "You got some…" She made an all-encompassing gesture of her face. When Sakura was finished cleaning herself with a rag Tenten handed her, the latter continued to question her:

"What makes him so special?"

She was expecting a detailed description of his physical characteristics, but was surprised to hear: "He's a friend. And he's … in a bad way. Everyone deserves happiness. Some just need a little help getting it." Her tone was soft but there was a hardness that forecast her determination.

"So, you're going to punch it into him?" Tenten chuckled as she imagined Sakura pummeling the former heartthrob until he smiled.

"Something like that. Haven't you ever felt that way about anyone?" Sakura had assumed Tenten would be more experienced in matters of the heart seeing as she was an entire year older, but the elder just laughed loudly. Shaking out her brown hair, she did not seem offended but honestly amused.

"No, all my time is spent with this guy!" She gave Neji a soft kick in the leg. His attention was turned towards them for the first time. He did not seem particularly interested, still.

Sakura sighed and her gaze became blurred. She was clearly remembering better times. "I fell in love with Sasuke while training," she confessed woefully. "It just couldn't be helped."

"He seems like a pretty tough guy to love." Tenten gave the lovesick girl her most compassionate smile. She got the impression Sakura was not as air-headed as previously assumed. The latter nodded with the same sad smile still lingering. Tenten was overcome with the sensation to cheer her up.

"In fact, I'd rather fall in love with this ice block over here than the boiling pot of barely suppressed rage, which went off to join a ragtag band of criminals."

Sakura chuckled and for a split second Tenten felt content about making someone else feel better. That was until she caught Neji's look. It was one she had never observed before and that in itself was uncanny. Her silent partner only had a limited amount of facial expressions, so in the last years she had gotten to know all of them very well. Seeing an unfamiliar one scared her to the core. Simultaneously the experience seemed so surreal that afterwards, she could not be sure it had actually occurred. Shifting her gaze away from Neji's now averted face, Tenten slowly became aware of Lee's laughter drawing closer. He was slapping his thigh and everything.

"Can you imagine!" he shrieked, then made kissy noises aimed at the only other guy in the vicinity. Neji was not amused. Tenten joined in the merriment with awkward laughter. After Neji had thrown a rock at the gasping-for-air Lee, the atmosphere returned to normal for Tenten. This was familiar territory. - It was time to play the diplomat between those two, opposite poles that they were.

After some impressive displays of Neji's knowledge of chakra flows and Lee's physical capabilities, the two were talked down by Tenten and agreed to call it a day. Sakura's honest compliment of Lee's thai-jutsus prompted him to walk her home, a misguided attempt to place himself in her heart, or pants, or both. Tenten felt sure he was wasting his time, but she knew him as well as she did Neji. One thing was for certain, Lee would pursue his passion until he or it died. It was a hopeless cause. Therefore, Tenten let the two of them walk off in the direction of Sakura's home. The girl was politely listening to a story of his about something amazing that he did.

"You wanna meet at dawn tomorrow to avoid those two?" Tenten asked when they were out of earshot, and shouldered her weaponry bag. Neji nodded. Before they parted ways, he asked her something:

"Did you mean it?" His voice always had a sultry, deep sound to it. It was a pity he never said anything nice with it.

"Hell yeah. They're super annoying."

"That you'd rather fall in love with the ice block."

"Oh."

"That is me, correct?"

Stopped dead in her tracks, the same feeling as before overcame her. A mixture of genuine fear and surrealism.

"No!," she spat out. He frowned.

"I mean, yes," she corrected herself. Realizing that she was acting strange, Tenten found her composure, smiled and replied with a calmness she did not feel: "What I meant was yes, you are the referred to ice block."

"Who you would rather fall in love with."

The sentence hung in the air between them for the duration of their shared breath. Then Tenten exhaled and scoffed: "No, of course not."

The sun set before either of them could arrive home.


	2. The Actual Beginning

There was a bit of crying. It made her bit uncomfortable. Tenten and Lee were seated in a booth at the same bar the group had celebrated her 21st birthday at and the latter was the only soul in all the world who was surprised by the outcome at hand.

"I cannot believe she went back to him! He's a murderer! And a psycho and… I don't know, just wrong for her. She's so, so, so, sweet," he blubbered between bouts of snotty crying fits. It had finally happened. Sakura and Sasuke. That brave girl would finally be able to beat some happiness into him. Tenten had no idea how the gal had managed it but she had captured a place in Sasuke's heart. The surprising thing was not that Sakura had found a vacancy but that the institution even existed at all. Tenten would have expected the boy, well, man by now, to be a traumatized wreck of a human. While contemplating this, she patted Lee on the arm. Coming to think of it, being traumatized had probably always been part of Sasuke's personality. In conclusion, Sakura should be able to deal with it by now. Maybe those crazy kids had a chance after all. After all, Sakura had always loved that screwed-up, arrogant young man-

This was the moment Neji chose to enter the establishment, so Tenten's attention was directed towards him. He towered tall over his cousin, the radiating Hinata. Her iridescent skin caused her smile to glow. It was like watching two godlike creatures walk into the bar, one consisting of light, the other of gloomy shadow. While it was amazing how much Hinata had changed over the years, it was just as amazing how Neji had managed to stunt any and all develop from beyond his conceited self. Her personality had bloomed from a shy girl with cripplingly low self-esteem into a picture of strength and kindness, while he had, essentially, managed to stay exactly the same. The same old facial expressions, determination, and general lack of agreeability had never wavered.

Hinata floated into a seat next to Lee, her soft face broadcasting compassion. She lightly touched Lee's shoulder and it instantly made him feel much better than all of Tenten's patting had accomplished.

"I guess I'm not needed anymore," Tenten murmured sarcastically but without bitterness. She was aware comforting was not her strong suit. Basically, if you could not fix it by throwing stuff at it, it was not in her repertoire of skills. The guy who felt much like her scooched next to her into her side of the booth. Neji's long hair fell into her lap and Tenten had to remove it with a mildly annoyed countenance. Buns. That's what she would do with all the hair. If she had her way, she would take the entirety of the shiny sheet of jet-blackness and tie it up into two tight buns. But it was not her head, so she contented herself with just sipping her drink and marvelling at Hinata's social skills. Lee's sobbing had simmered down to a soft whimper. Within a week, he would be pursuing Hinata and praising youth for its fiery life force, Tenten predicted.

"You want her to be happy, right?" Hinata's lovely voice guessed. Lee nodded.

"She's been fighting for this for the last five years. Wouldn't you say she deserves this a little?" Lee was not a simple-minded person, as many thought. He was single- but not simple-minded. Once he put his mind to something, no boulder would stand in his way. It was stunning to watch him pursue a goal. He was the best of friends and worst of enemies. His upset, though cause for much amusement over the years, was not rooted in irrationality or an overindulgence in silly feelings. He, too, had known Sakura for many years and truly cared for her. He had trained her, protected her, nurtured her. Despite all the off-putting snot running from his nose, one could not ignore the true tragedy of the situation. Two persons' gain was one's loss.

Unless you were Neji, of course, for whom ignoring it posed no difficulty. This was only too apparent as Tenten shot him a look and saw the boredom displayed between his strands of hair.

"Why did you even come?", she wondered in a whisper. Her face was close enough for Neji to feel her breath on his cheek.

"Lee's a team member."

"You're an Anbu leader. None of us are your team member anymore," she corrected him. That he did not like. The warrior pretended to be above such things as petty inclinations, but he was a very proud man nonetheless.

"I look after my team," he pressed through clenched teeth. Ah, yes, the dutiful Hyuuga, a born leader with just a splash of arrogance. Tenten suppressed a sigh. Replying would be of no consequence to him. She leaned back, into her corner of the booth. Lee and Hinata were chatting about life and love in general. Presently, she was telling Lee how she and Naruto had started dating. Moved by their sweet love for one another, Lee's tears were of a completely different nature now. He thanked her for sharing.

"That's so sweet of you to say," she replied. "You know, even if you haven't found your soulmate yet, friends are a great way to pass the time," she encouraged pointing towards the two sulking figures across the table. Lee's mouth broke into a huge grin, sporting incredibly white teeth. "You're right. I have the best team!" He reached across the table and grabbed their hands. Tenten was touched, but Neji failed to suppress a scoff. Lee wanted them to do a team huddle and shout out some kind of praise on life and youth, but Neji flat out refused.

"You know, Neji, one of these days you're going to have to show your friends your softer side," Hinata remarked casually. "You're not a block of ice." She said it matter-of-factly as if she were instructing a kid to cease being careless with its toys because they were not indestructible. For his cousin her words seemed unremarkable seeing how she asked everyone for their drink preference and consequently stood up to place their orders at the bar.

"I'll help you carry!" Lee jumped up energetically, quickly finding back to his everlasting cheerfulness. Neither one realized that they were leaving their other two friends behind in a very awkward situation.

Neji nor Tenten could be sure whether the other felt the same, but the phrase 'block of ice' reminded them of a silly incident in their teenage years. But it pursued them into their early adult years like acne scars. It was not something they thought about constantly and, really, it hardly affected their relationship at all. But every time anyone mentioned the words "ice" and "block" when referring to Neji both of them were unwillingly transported back to a strange atmosphere a quarter of their life back. The same sinking feeling of fear and surrealism nested in Tenten's chest and she had to gulp down her beer to suppress it the second Hinata handed it to her.

"I need another one, slowpokes," she exclaimed and became unusually exasperated with Neji blocking her path out the booth. Both Hinata and Lee were trying to hide their subtle surprise behind their glasses as they watched the two close friends and constant sparring partners wrestle shortly for dominance of the both. Neji turned out to be the winning party by not budging until Tenten mouthed a formal request ending with an aggressive "please".

Neji felt a strange sensation spill over him. He experienced regret very infrequently. A few exceptions were his earlier treatment of Naruto and Hinata, who he had grown to respect greatly over the years. But what had just transpired with Tenten was not deemed worthy of that feeling in his mind. It had been just one, tiny interaction. He had understood that she wanted to pass. He had felt her nudging his leg under the table. Yet, he had refused to give into her request. His stubbornness was inexplicable. When Tenten returned he made a point of standing up immediately to let her through. Tenten acknowledged the gesture with a curt nod and the rest of the evening was spent back in a companionable mindset. They drank and laughed, well, smirked in Neji's case. At the end, their mission of cheering up Lee had been successfully accomplished. If nothing else, Neji could at least be satisfied that he had fulfilled his duty as a colleague to a fellow, capable ninja.

As they were paying the bill, Hinata mentioned she was meeting Naruto and some of the others at another venue. There was talk of dancing. Of course Lee was immediately captivated. Hinata looked expectantly to Tenten, but she had to decline:

"I have a mission coming up and need to see Tsunade early tomorrow morning to discuss the details and in the afternoon, I got an appointment to get my ass kicked by this fella so no Kiri-Gakure ninjas will manage." She winked at Hinata as her outstretched thumb pointed towards Neji.

"What about you?" Lee asked hopping from one foot to the other. His hyperactivity was the lingering result of a vodka red bull. "You're not meeting Tenten until the afternoon. So, why don't you come and have fun with us for once?!"

Neji's respond was a sound so rare it appeared unnerving at first. Neji was laughing. It was a very subtle, quiet laugh, but the message was obvious. The mere thought of him meeting up with others, possibly going dancing, was enough to entertain even him. A peculiar thought flickered through Tenten's brain. His white teeth blinking, his lips parted in something resembling joy - it almost made Neji look human.

After they all said their goodbyes, Neji helped Hinata into her jacket, so Tenten was already off towards home when he stepped into the cold night air. Her silhouette was slim and cast a long intermittent shadow from the bar's rhythmic lighting. No one was more surprised than him when he started to pick up the pace until he had caught up. Lee's voice could be heard shouting something in the distance.

"You know, I'm not," Neji muttered from behind.

Her dark face displayed incomprehension as she swiveled around. Her feet did not skip a beat and she continued backwards.

"Huh?", she said in one of her less eloquent moments. A lamppost was coming up, but before Neji could reposition her body, she had already sidestepped it. How she managed without eyes like his he would never know, but he felt a smidgen of awe. Someone as mediocre as she was very special. It took courage to be good without being outstanding, constantly overshadowed by prodigal talent. He would have liked to tell her but he was certain his verbal skills were not adequate enough to make a compliment about mediocrity come out right. Instead he chose to say something for which his eloquence was just sufficient:

"An ice block."

She tried to hide it but she had definitely flinched.

"Sure," she murmured and turned her steps forward again. He faced the back of her head as they walked. It didn't sound like she was trying to pick a fight by teasing him. Sometimes he missed the early days of their collaboration when she had admired him. Now her usual modus operandi was to make fun of his flaws. She liked teasing him. It was quite awful. All the more reason to be thankful she was not doing it in a situation as delicate as this.

"I'm serious," his deep, smooth voice felt compelled to state.

She turned around once more, light-footedly stepping past a puddle of vomit.

"Are you ever not?" There was a grin resting in the right corner of her mouth. It was waiting for an opening. Regardless, she had a point. Neji could not guess why he had stated the obvious. Without discussing why, he followed her to her apartment. Tenten was not the sort of woman one 'brought' home. It implied some appreciation for the nostalgic concepts of a gentleman and a lady. Tenten was nowhere near a lady. She could not be brought, she could barely be accompanied. In conclusion, he simply followed her. She was easy to follow. She never got lost. Not just geographically.

Hence, when they reached the door, he followed her inside. The familiar enclosure of her cheap small apartment on the third floor of a run-down apartment building held conflicting sensations for him. It put him in mind of returning to a place visited in dreams. It was familiar, yet it was not; because it was not really his to have. The level of control he possessed here was only equaled when asleep.

Her shoulder was revealed as she slid off her jacket. Then she released the brown waves of her hair previously confined in a practical hairdo.

"You want anything?", she finally asked, pausing only long enough for him to shake his head before she sauntered off to change into sweatpants and pour herself another drink.

Once she had taken a sip, Neji bothered to take his jacket off too. Her small apartment was kitchen, living- and bedroom all in one. Stepping through the front door placed one in the middle of her kitchen. Here it was important to watch one's legs as they were prone to bumping into the table or, more commonly, chairs which happened to always be strewn around the place randomly. Why, Neji had never bothered to ask. Probably she used them as stepping stones to reach high things in her kitchen cabinets and then just forgot to put them back. As the tile changed to old carpeting, one became aware that the living room was upon them. Here reigned a huge couch, taking up most of the space, where Tenten loved to hang out in her underwear and watch tv on her ridiculously small screen. She usually slept there as well, which was the only reason why the small bed in the faraway corner was usually made and not a mess of pillows and covers. Taking a second sip of her drink, she lowered herself into the cushions of the sofa. Most things were in grey or beige tones. Whether she bought them that way or dust camouflaged them, Neji could never tell. The same furniture had resided here for ages.

"I wish we wouldn't talk about it again", she confessed just as suddenly as he had hit her over the head with his words after leaving the bar.

His raised eyebrow indicated consternation.

"The ice block thing," she spelled out. "It just… I dunno. It just gives me a really creepy feeling talking about your… feelings." She realized her clumsy semantics and shrugged helplessly. Drawing nearer to her, he lowered himself to the edge of the couch.

"I agree."

Evident relief was written all over her face. Exhaling with a bright smile, she confided: "One would think I'd be a little better at this stuff by now. But truth be told, I'm still as clueless as I was back then with Sakura."

Neji was not entirely sure what she was referring to. Hence, he inquired.

"Oh, it's a stupid thing. You wouldn't remember." As she returned to her usual, casual and comfortable self, she spread out between the cushions. "Years ago, -we had just started hanging out with Sakura,- she was astonished at my lack of romantic experience. The whole thing was kinda embarrassing for me and whenever it gets mentioned I get the same awkward feeling." She shrugged again. "Teenagers, huh." She grinned as if she regarded her teenage self apart from herself.

He nodded although he did not completely grasp it. He was uncomfortable with uncertainty and he was not entirely certain what he was doing at her apartment at 12:30 in the morning. As he gained ground on her couch, moving from the edge to a more centered position on his cushion, she retracted her feet, indicating a similar uncertainty as to what his purpose here was.

Doubt began to grow as both ran out of chatter.

"I assure you, any awkwardness was purely coincidental."

She nodded. "I know."

"Often?", he enquired.

"No. It's just sometimes. Just when…" Whilst searching for words, her lips remained on the glass' brim. "Emotions are weird," she concluded. He nodded.

"Do you… Do you ever get that ... impression?" Her phrasing was crafted with extra care. He could tell by her hesitation. He nodded yet again. Because she looked so expectant, he even ventured a few words of elucidation.

"Your birthday. This year."

Tenten seemed intrigued. Unconsciously, she scooted closer.

"What happened?"

"Sakura's friend, the annoying one, said now you might legally drink, you were entitled to have as many drunken one-night stands as you want."

"That's not related to emotions," she blurted out.

Neji disagreed. Tenten disagreed back.

"The sexual act involves… some kind of feeling. Presumably," he enlightened her.

"Not when you do it the way Ino does," Tenten ventured. It stunned him into silence. After the quiet stretch had dragged on for more than five minutes, Tenten began to feel uncomfortable. She could not pinpoint what it was: Usually, their silences were companionable filled with nuanced understanding. But tonight, there was none of that. It was as if their selves had become disharmonious. As if, somehow, they were different people.

"Neji," Tenten stammered. His gaze rose to meet hers. "I'm sorry." Honesty dripped from her message.

"I didn't mean- We don't have to … talk about sex. It's just that ...you said something that sounded inaccurate and - I haven't even kissed anyone." She smiled haplessly. "So, what do I know? You could be right..." Her smile crumbled. Desperately scrambling to find the part of her that usually occupied her body and was comfortable with Neji, she started pouring out of her mouth:

"A very uncomfortable moment for me was three years ago - Remember, that fight we had on a mission. It was something stupid. About the southern or northern route. Anyway, that night you slept on the other side of the fire, on Lee's side. Which you never do. You always sleep close to-" While trying to scan her insides for the part of her that was in harmony with Neji, she had nearly revealed something she would rather keep to herself. Actually, from herself. She felt reluctant to admit being denied his barely audible breathing at night had impacted her so, to herself or anyone else.

Neji could see how dry her lips grew as she forgot to close her mouth. Her look seemed bewildered.

"Have you really never kissed anyone?", he wondered. The inquiry would have been more startling if the entire evening had not been outlandish already. Tenten felt herself slipping into an ambivalent mindset. It was unclear whether it was more comparable to giving up and drowning in the ocean or scraping one's courage together and jumping into the deep end of the pool. Regardless of which water-based metaphor she chose, she had lost control of her language. She heard herself say "yes" as if from far away.

His lips seemed to savor her response. Consecutively, he said "Me neither."

"That's not surprising," she pointed out, which they both endorsed. This was Neji, after all.

But Tenten was nothing like him. She was nice. She was fun. She had lots of friends. He asked her about it. She could not remember him ever being this interested in her life.

"I've just never felt comfortable," she heard herself say, again as if the voice were coming from somewhere other than her mouth.

He nodded. That made sense.

Always practical-minded, he generated a solution. "You could practice," he suggested.

"What - kissing my pillow? That's pathetic." She rolled her eyes and for a split second the old Tenten possessed her, scoffing loudly. Then she was gone again because of something Neji did. Or rather, did not do. He did not voice his next suggestion. He did not have to. It hung in the room, above their heads like a piano, ready to topple, crushing them. Tenten unlocked her arms. She could not breathe. How she was sustaining life was beyond her. An invisible thread lifted her ribcage gently. Her hair mingled with his on the pillows as she slid closer. His breathing was imperceptible too.

"Are you drunk?", she whispered. The shake of his head did not astonish her. She was not drunk either. The strangeness came from somewhere deep inside of them. This situation was caused by them, not booze. It was scary because then there would be no one to blame. As they leaned into each other's chest the thumping of their hearts rattled their bones. As their lips touched, breathing kicked in again making it an awkward encounter. Yet, they did not part. The warmth of their skins surrounded them like miasma: Thick and toxic. It enclosed them making their breathing heavy. Her lips' dryness caused them to feel like a spiky mountain chain, He moistened them by running his tongue along them. Before either of them could help it, their kiss had deepened. It turned Tenten into a strange creature, shivering as she leaned in and forcing him to enclose her with his arms. Their bodies could not decide between tenderness and defense. Years of training combat confused their extremities, touching arms and thighs they had spent years attacking, preparing one another for the worst. Now they were supposed to perform a completely different act. Without any practice this was a daunting act. Invading her mouth with his tongue was something he had never thought himself capable of but as she curled up on his lap it seemed less impossible than even a minute ago. Unfamiliar thoughts and impulses flared up in Neji's mind. He found his hand strangely tender as it caressed her cheek, a gesture he had never contemplated doing before. As he leaned back, she followed. Her weight was familiar and reassuring in a sea of chaos. As a consequence, his fingers crept along her naked skin and eventually found their way up her shirt. Encased between her and the clothes he could distinguish every single rib. He held the cage as if it were made of gold. Heavy but precious. Bringing her to his side, he missed her weight but she stayed connected at the legs, wrapping one decidedly around his.

"When you practice, you really use the opportunity, huh," she mused. Her hands were buried deep in his hair. It was intermingled with hers. Carefully they began to untangle it, parting black from brown and vice versa. His aristocratic paleness was offset by the tan of her entire skin. Glimpses of her body assured him it was her natural skin tone. After swallowing hard, he lay one finger next to her navel. She caved in, so he could feel the hard muscle underneath, like a beast below her supple facade. He watched as he perceived all the golden-brown hairs on her stomach stand to attention. He leaned down, she scooted away. Her movement made him pause and they shared a long look. Then her hands crept up his face again guiding him by the jaw. He kissed her belly. It resonated in him as she shivered. It gave him an ache in his core. The next time he kissed her there, she made a sound as if in pain. Up to this point he had not been sure whether he enjoyed this experience, but now he was certain he did not. Immediately all contact points were severed with an efficiency inherent to his very being. Luckily for them, Tenten was not a timid creature. She pulled him back in, decidedly.

"Don't stop," she whispered and pressed his head back up against her. Slowly he returned back to the feeling of uncertainty, eventually turning into pleasure as he got accustomed to the noises he drew from her. He was not prone to addiction, his iron discipline made sure of that, but he felt himself being drawn to her body by a physical need previously undiscovered. Laying his body on top of hers molded them together. Their sweat mingled and the salty taste spurned him on more. He continued up her torso, pushing her shirt up with the tip of his nose. There was an elegance to her writhing that reminded him of a snake. Scaly perfection was translated into a toned body. Her hands left him to pull the T-shirt over her head. He had never seen a topless woman up close before. The molds of her breasts spilled over her torso and the areolas tightened under his breath. He kissed them instinctively, eliciting another moan. As they continued their journey she seemed to anticipate his moves. A push and pull evolved between them as she met his lips with bare skin. He wondered whether this was what people referred to when they talked about human connection. He felt as if they were bound together by an invisible elastic band.

Tenten had had trouble fusing the two images together at first. Here they were, childhood friends evolved into partners and colleagues. She sometimes forgot this was the same person who had admonished her for not pushing her limits enough during training. His sultry voice criticizing her into defiance and now she was willingly letting him see every inch of her flawed self. Every scar lay bare, every failure minutely detailed. Uncannily, she could not wait for him to see more. When he had worked himself up to her neck, she could feel his rough hand tentatively on her chest. It was a warm, electrifying feeling, wholly unexpected. As he kissed her jawline, she felt a knot building inside of her, but it was devoid of anxiety. Carefully she extricated her legs from his and began sliding her pants down over one hip. He caught onto the gesture quickly and assisted her smoothly. His large looming presence blanketed her as he revealed her dark triangle flowing into her thick, dark legs. She wondered how he would proceed from here. He paused to inspect a particularly deep gnash on her upper thigh. Tenten remembered it well. It had been a moment of deep disappointment for her. Her failure to react quickly enough had resulted in the injury and it had barely missed a vital artery. Now all that was left was a broad purple bulge. His fingers traced its contours. As he kissed it, it was more than a physical sensation. Something inside her melted and she parted her legs for him. She had only ever done this for herself, touching her vulva in a mixture of embarrassment and need. When he touched her there, it was completely different. She felt no shame; on the contrary, she felt accepted. Fluidly the rest of her pants slid over her feet and to the floor by his gentle hand. She would have never imagined his touch so tender, had not thought him capable. But he proved her wrong, amazing her yet again with instinctual talent. She slid the insides of her thighs up his upper body and found his clothes restricting the experience. Up until now they had only undressed her. It left her uncertain how he would react if she attempted to strip him. But his breath reassured her. When she sat upright and put her hands on his shoulders he did not protest. She let them drop to his back and buried them in the fabric pulling it softly over and off him. His torso did not have nearly as many scars as hers did. A soft tweak of envy flared up but was soon replaced by something greater as she slid her eyes up to meet his. Again, another expression of his was committed to her memory. It had only happened once before. It reminded her that it was impossible to ever truly know a person in all their facettes. But right now she felt she was a lot closer to knowing him than she ever had been before. If this were any other man than Neji she would have called the look vulnerable. It was not that she had never seen him topless. But this was incomparable. His hairless chest tightened underneath her grip. As she drove him back there was no contumacy and he let her unzip his tailor-made pants without incident. Undressing him strengthened the knot in her core. It made it difficult for her to inhale.

The fine hairs on his shins were elevated as the fabric electrified them on their way down. The two of them sat opposite one another, staring. His posture was impeccable, hers was slouched, her skin creasing finely around her navel. A finger of hers stretched out and touched the tip of his engorged penis. The light touch peeled away the foreskin magically. Like a cat on all fours, she crawled towards him, placing each leg on either of his sides. As she lowered herself, resistance was minimal.

This was the closest another person had ever been to him. Neji could feel moans of his own escape his lips. It was like being hit by something. He could think of no other analogy for the intensity of the sensation. Her firm grip on his shoulders held him in place, but the effort it took to hold still brought tears to the corners of his eyes. He buried his face in her hair. Her exhales hit his earlobes hot and heavy. They increased steadily in synchronicity with her movement. He was trying his best to keep calm, but something told him it would be a fruitless attempt. Without even realizing his gentle cradle of her was tightened, his fingers digging into her hips. The close embrace made it more difficult to move but by now they were so entwined that the softest of swaying had the largest impact. Her breath turned to moans, then gaps, and lastly screams. He was unaware of what his own voice was engaging in. As the feeling grew evermore excessive, both their muscles tightened until they stiffened. He let himself tip backwards and as they landed in the softness of the sofa's cushions, he became aware of one last shout, definitely his and yet completely alien to him. Still tightly stuck to one another, they lay, waves of thrill and horror washing over them. Horror as the realization settled in that they had no idea of how to come back from this. Images of Tenten putting up her hair before training, laughing at Lee raced through his mind and were joined by foreign invaders of her moaning and bending towards him. Her mind was bursting full with conflicting inputs of him disciplining her during missions and simultaneously whispering her name into her ear as if in a trance. They began to shiver as neither dared to let go and face each other. So, they just continued to lay there until one by one, their muscles relaxed leaving behind a sickening feeling of betrayal. As if they had cheated on their friendship. Tenten stared ashamed over his shoulder at her clothes on the floor.

Then the look on his face reappeared before her inner eye as he had sat calmly and nakedly in front of her. She held onto that look. This time she felt positive it was unimagined. Surreal it may have been but unreal it most certainly was not. It had burned itself onto her soul. The thought encouraged her to loosen her clutch. Only reluctantly did he do the same. As they parted he refused to show his face, choosing to hide it behind the veil of his silken hair. Undeterred, she curled up in the mould of his body, her ear pressed to his chest. Badump-Badump. A human heart. It beat just like hers. She took his hand and allowing for no argument she placed it above her own heart. The sound of each other's beats lulled them to sleep.

The following morning, they found themselves entangled in each other's hair, limbs and souls. Tentatively without peeking, they extricated themselves. There was some temporary awkwardness as Tenten unraveled a portion of his mane from her inner thigh. Backs to each other, they dressed themselves. Tenten migrated towards the kitchen and put on the kettle. Then she mixed oatmeal with some nuts and milk and heated it while steadily stirring. Neji, left behind in the living room, understood it was not time to leave yet. He could not even determine whether he wanted to. Crippled by an unusual bout of indecisiveness, he sat still. His clothes felt heavy on him. She handed him his bowl and took a seat next to him. None of their body parts were touching as she began to blow carefully onto the steaming porridge. After taking a few bites, she cleared her throat. It prompted him to peek at her. His face had returned to familiar impassivity. It did not matter though, because all she saw was the same look as yesterday. It burned inside of her. Before she had managed to push out any words, Neji ejected: "Let's not speak to anyone about this." His voice did not sound as horrified as she had anticipated. She nodded her accord silently.

When he had finished, she was only halfway through.

"Would you like some more?" she asked. He was full, but he was nodding. After she had gotten up, he had made up his mind. Apparently, he did not want to leave. Dutifully he ate his second helping although he was already full. He was conflicted about how to proceed. How to communicate something he did not comprehend himself?

"Tenten."

She gave him her attention at the sound of his voice.

"I do not wish to leave."

"That's ok." Her tone made him believe it. He felt oddly relieved.

"I have to go to Tsunade's in an hour," she reminded him. "But you can stay here. Wait for me." It sounded like a question more than an offer. He assented. They spent the remaining time drinking tea in the company of their well-known, companionable silence. He also watched her get ready, then did the dishes. He was scraping their breakfast pot when she left. After that there was nothing left to do; he contemplated tidying her apartment just to busy himself. But he knew from experience she would not appreciate this. So he stepped to her book closet next to the forlorn bed in the corner and selected a classic. As he settled into the couch, he became enamored with her smell. It still lingered. It was strange how it had changed over night. It had never been unpleasant but now it held something within it. A promise of hope, he would have guessed had he been a more sentimental man. But he was not, so he ignored it and forced the words of his selected literature into his mind. He was relieved when she came back because he felt the sensation of being unable to concentrate properly unsettling.

He set the book aside. He could tell she was thinking about turning on the television, but decided against it. Instead she turned towards him, waiting for inspiration.

"I feel strange. Do you feel strange?" she wondered aloud. He thought about it for less than a minute but had to admit he had no better way of describing it either. He nodded.

"So, what do you want to do now? Agree to never do it again or … " She had not quite figured out what the alternative option would be. Neji had heard of relationships. They did not seem like something he was interested in. He told her so.

"Oh god, no!" she agreed laughing softly at the thought of the two of them in a relationship. It was the most ridiculous thing she had heard thus far.

"But would you like to … come over more frequently?"

This was something he found easy to agree to. They had no idea how to handle the situation, so they shook hands.

"Let's say… - you have family dinner on Wednesdays -", she murmured to herself. "…Thursday nights then?"

Thursday suited him well.

"But we don't tell anyone!", she reminded him.

"Of course not," he agreed eagerly, then added: "And we don't meet any other people… like that."

"Of course not," Tenten assented just as eagerly. They found the terms very agreeable. After a while Tenten included one more rule: "And we never do it any other time than Thursday nights." She swallowed hard. "It needs to be … contained," she added by way of explanation. He found himself nodding appreciatively. Yes, it definitely needed containment. Otherwise it would wreak havoc on his life. They both breathed more easily after that.

Tenten felt as if she could speak more freely now that they had discussed some ground rules.

It just felt so weird for her. She could not even imagine how weird it would be for others. Whatever this was, it was crucial to keep it between them.

"This wouldn't be our first secret from the world." She nudged her co-conspirator. He let it pass without comment. Tenten was wondering about something though and was not yet ready to drop the subject.

"Was this... unavoidable, like ...meant to be?" She hastily continued when she caught his facial expression. "Not in a cheesy way, but does the two of us being like this make any sense? Or do you think this is completely crazy?"

He had definitely felt close to insanity last night. But he was sure that was a personal problem, not something inherent to the situation.

"Like, are we kidding ourselves?" Tenten realized that her friend was not following her train of thought. "Maybe we caught a parasite at the bar that's influencing our behavior or maybe we really were drunk and just didn't realize."

Neji was not one to ruminate. He admitted he had been having some uncommon emotional turmoil, but thinking about it clearly, he was not sure he even understood her concern. To her, this seemed crazy. To him, the more he thought about it, it became less of an issue. If someone handed him the perfect weapon, the most suitable kunai ever, so that he never would have to look at another kunai again, he would not be asking whether he was meant to or whether it made sense to have it.

He did perceive her furrowed brow though, therefore, he was aware she would be demanding an answer whether he was particularly willing to supply one or not. It took him a long time to contribute one.

When he finally said the following words, Tenten sensed he was having great difficulty getting it all out. It was something he never allowed himself to think, let alone say aloud:

"All I know is... the day you talked with Sakura, I do remember. I heard my heart pound for the first time outside of a combat scenario." He was not sure the words had any meaning to her, but it was the only comment he could think of. After that, he was done. His emotional capacity had been exhausted. Any more talk and it would flow over. Tenten sensed it and they decided to go train. They stopped for fresh clothes at Neji's home and fell back into their routine as best as they could.

They managed quite well, though they both agreed implicitly to end their training early that day. Crashing into each other's bodies suddenly had a depth to it which was difficult to endure for long stretches of time.


	3. The Middle

Two years later, it was a Thursday night again. Neji held her close to him, waiting for her breathing to calm, soaking up her energy and scent. She had been on the longest mission yet, taking her away for several months. His Thursday nights had been anguished. More so, because his family had been oblivious to his state. Not that it was their fault. It was impossible to read him and he was incapable of expressing emotional distress if his life depended on it. So, when Tenten asked him how his time had been spent he answered coolly: "I've been kept busy. Went to Suna-Gakure a few times and my uncle is planning a family reunion, which, apparently, requires a lot of meetings wherein which the same content is discussed at length."

Tenten smiled against his bare chest. They lay on her couch, a light blanket draped around her shoulders. She had been away on a secret mission, but she had given him to understand that she had missed the warmth of her home. She had been far up north.

Underneath her he shifted uncomfortably. Surprised Tenten slid off of him. He felt compelled to pull her close again, but he had grown unaccustomed to their romantic interaction. He felt unable to physically express his desire for proximity. He had not shifted because of her weight but because he had something to say and, as always, that gave him a hard time.

"Something peculiar has been happening," he informed her. Tenten's interest was peaked. She sat upright and he followed suit.

"What's that?" she encouraged him to speak.

He hesitated slightly less than before. "We have a distant cousin visiting. My uncle is insisting I spend time with her. It is peculiar because Hinata is the clear choice for this task."

Tenten's heart skipped a beat and it clearly showed on her face. She could tell Neji had noticed but he probably did not grasp what it meant. She pulled the blanket to cover her nakedness. Her bareness felt unsafe to her suddenly. She tried to hide it with an upbeat tone of voice: "So what's she like?"

Neji proceeded to give a report. "She is very pretty and capable at anything related to home economics. She is quiet enough. But…" Tenten was trying hard not to hang on his words. "People are talking behind our backs. I can see it. It seems rather blatant to engage in an action when they know I am more than capable of observing it anyways."

"That's true," Tenten said noncommittal. When he did not continue, she asked: "Are you aware of what it is they're saying?" It sounded more like a statement. Neji did not answer. Instead he confessed: "I am uncertain… about what to do." His gaze was fixated on the folds on her blanket where it bulged over her chest.

"I think you know what to do," Tenten replied curt. He considered her statement.

"Would you accompany me?" His request was so unlike him that at first, she was not sure she had heard him correctly. Lastly, Tenten nodded, but she kept the sheet tightly around her, even as she settled back into his chest. He made sure not to enclose her too tightly.

They had not spoken since but, now, the next morning, Tenten could hear the comfortable baritone of Neji's voice from behind the closed doors. First thing the next morning, they had gotten dressed and walked over to the Hyuuga's large estate. They had done so in silence, taking in the other's presence. The place had been full of bustling life. There were many new, haughty, pretty faces around, so Tenten could not determine whether any of the new arrivals were the lady Neji had mentioned. Apparently, the Hyuga family was full of pretty young women. Navigating their way securely through the high long hallways had been no problem for Neji. He had an aura that practically screamed at passerbys not to approach him. If they were surprised to see Tenten with him, they tried to conceal it with lowered heads and shuffling feet. Only Hinata shot them a puzzling glance as they passed her. Tenten waved and Hinata smiled back but was unable to pull away from some of the servants who demanded her attention on the placement of several banquet tables.

Now Tenten was sitting on the bench with elaborate brocade upholstering in front of Hiashi's office listening him yell incoherent things at his nephew. After thirty minutes, Hinata came to join her. She did not utter a syllable, just placed her hand lightly on Tenten's. They breathed in unison as Hiashi's fit raged on. It was impossible to make out whole sentences through the thick oak doors but certain keywords echoed unmistakingly through the large waiting room. When a particularly harsh insult resounded, Hinata squeezed her friend's fingers. Tenten replied with the lightest of pressure. Every once in a while they could hear Neji reply monosyllably. Even through the seemingly impenetrable office doors Neji's indifference was apparent. It radiated through the entire house.

Tenten felt sure that within an hour the entire village would be aware. Hinata remained silently compassionate with her until the shouting had died down. They could hear Neji talking for slightly longer stretches of time now. Which was still pretty short by anyone else's standards. As she left, Hinata smiled encouragingly and mouthed "Speak to you soon." Her shape was just disappearing around the corner as Neji emerged. He closed the heavy doors behind him carefully.

"He wasn't happy," he informed her needlessly.

"So I heard."

"It's time to move."

Tenten did not know what he expected her to reply to that.

"You should get a place in town."

She raised her eyebrows.

"I don't have the money for that," she retorted stupidly. He had seen her bank statements. Not everyone could be employee of the year, gaining huge bonuses. Some people just worked and did their best. She almost felt insulted that he failed to understand this difference between them.

They heard Hiashi, who presumably already considered them gone, exclaim several profanities. His lower lip twitched.

"You hear that?" Tenten was confused by his question. It was difficult not to hear, even when you were trying your best.

He continued: "I know someone with family trouble, who would… welcome a roommate."

So, they moved in together.

The process itself was not very difficult. They threw all of Tenten's books into a box, all of her partly broken, partly antique and not in a good way kitchenware into the garbage and hired a moving van to deal with the monstrosity of the couch. What was a bit disconcerting was dealing with everyone knowing. As expected, Konoha-Gakure's consternation was boundless. Weird did not even begin to cover it, in everyone's opinion.

The street lights illuminated their living room as Tenten pulled apart the curtains to open a window. The fresh air would do them good after three hours of discussing a mission the three of them had been assigned together. It had been quite some time since Tenten, Neji, and Lee had been on a joint mission. It must have been about five years ago, shortly after they had moved in together. Tenten had always thought that it was one of the ways Tsunade's strange sense of humor was expressed. Of course Lee had spent the entire trip throwing questions such as "But how?", "When did this happen?" and "Are you two for real then?" at them. Luckily, Lee had gotten used to them as an item over the years. Every once in a while they could feel people in the village still looking at the pair of them with an expression of mild confusion, but the worst of it was long behind them. The two of them hardly went out in public anyway. Date night was staying at home on Tenten's ageing couch watching a weapon's documentary.

Lee was clearing away maps and spy reports from the large mahogany dining table when the bell rang. Neji was in the kitchen checking on the food that had been simmering peacefully in a slow cooker. So, it was only Tenten and Lee who exchanged surprised looks.

"Are you expecting something, Neji?" she asked. She had to raise her voice a little because their condo was a lot larger than Tenten's tiny little old apartment had been. The dining and living room alone, connected by three beautiful tall archways, could hold more than thirty people. An indistinct muffled noise indicated a negative response of his. She proceeded towards the front door and found it was a cheerful delivery man, handing her a package and asking to sign for it. When she saw it had been sent from the Hyuuga address, she felt like checking the packing for anthrax. Lee was less concerned.

"Maybe it's from Hinata," he suggested. Tenten found that highly unlikely. They had met her and Naruto for lunch only yesterday. Surely, they would have mentioned anything like this.

Anxiously they waited for Neji to rejoin them at the dining table. Lee could hardly contain his excitement, he was shaking the box close to his ear.

"Is Hiashi still calling you the bitch who stole his prodigy?" he inquired casually. He would never talk like this in public but with just the three of them he felt completely comfortable referencing all the terrible things they had confided in him over the years.

"It has been unusually quiet," Tenten admitted. "The last lawyer's letter we received about 'unlawful cohabitation' arrived more than a year ago." This fact did not make her feel any better though. Finally, Neji returned wiping his hands on his apron. He took one look at the return address and frowned heavily.

"Did you check for anthrax?" he demanded to know. But Lee was done waiting. He rolled his eyes and snatched the package back up into his arms. With the same energy he applied to everything in life he ripped it open, demonstrating remarkable strength and produced a sturdy red box. Undoing the clasp at the side, he flung it open to reveal an oval shaped bottle, with reddish brown fluid, narrowing into a long neck and topped with a cork in the design of the French royal lily.

"Martin? Louis? Who are these people?" Lee read out and wondered aloud.

"It's brandy," Neji informed them. His guard was up, so there was no telling as to what he thought. "It is my uncle's favorite."

Tenten noticed an envelope that had sailed to the floor during Lee's violent unpacking efforts. Hastily she collected it, unfolded and read it.

"On your five-year anniversary. I miss my nephew. Please visit for dinner sometime. Both of you. Signed Hyuuga Hiashi, current head of the Hyuuga family clan and city council and heritage restoration member of the village of Konoha. Ps: Hinata is very persuasive. Congratulations." There was silence among the three after Tenten had finished but of course Lee was the first to break it.

"Does this mean the feud is over?"

Tenten interjected "I'd hardly call it a feud", who found such words belonged in older times. Neji, who had been raised more traditionally, said "I would", but they ignored him. He seemed reluctant to forgive his uncle for his past grievances. Tenten had an inkling that Neji suspected a trap of some kind. But Tenten found the letter sincere and convincing given everything that had happened. Hinata had not invited her own father to her and Naruto's ceremony in favor of Neji and Tenten. The latter could fathom that it had struck the family man hard. Not only did his eldest daughter marry outside the family but she also disregarded any forms of decorum. Say what you want about Hiashi but when it came down to it, he was a practical man. She reckoned, he was beginning to understand that ruling with a firm hand was less effective with a generation not dependent on inheriting the family fortune. It was either die alone a bitter old man or wrap up a bottle of his finest. While Neji continued to inspect the bottle and the inside of its packaging suspiciously, she could not help but smile.

Wholly unprepared were they hit by Lee's questions:

"Does this mean you two will finally dare to kiss in public now?"

Neji stopped dead in his tracks. He was obviously uncomfortable and chose to leave abruptly to check in with dinner again. He would not dignify such a question with an answer, which left Tenten to the unpleasant task of doing so.

"That's not... We don't…" She decided to start over. "Hiashi's disapproval is not the reason for our lack of public displays of affection."

"Then what is? What's stopping you?"

Tenten scoffed and began clearing away the remnants of Lee's unpacking frenzy. "Have you met Neji?", she replied ironically, winking at him. Lee did admit to seeing her point. As Neji was returning with a large hotplate to keep the stew warm, Tenten was just saying "We're just not ready for that."

Neji proceeded to set the table as if this entire conversation had nothing to do with him.

Later that night, he buried his nose deep in her hair. Their bedroom was a dream of cream color and beige dominated by a monstrosity of a king size bed. A cool breeze swayed the chiffon curtains insufficiently detaining the moonlight.

"Neji?" she whispered softly.

"Hm?"

"Are you aware that we are distinctly different from any other couples our age?"

His shoulder moved in a way that could be a shrug or agreement. She stopped speaking. When Neji realized it had not been because she had fallen asleep, he ventured to ask: "Do you consider it a problem?"

"Not sure," she answered honestly. "What do you think?"

Neji did not think. Again, he failed to see the issue. He was what he was. There was no changing him. It was pointless to wish to be different.

"Don't you ever feel strange?", she asked a follow-up.

"Not so much anymore", he replied and removed his leg from on top of hers. The blankets shifted creating a new pattern of shadows from the reemerging folds. He had felt very strange the first few years.

"But neither of us has any experience outside of us. Even if we were doing it wrong, how would we know?"

Neji contemplated this concern. His response was practical to the core: "Problems one is not aware of do not exist. If you are not aware of it, it cannot be a problem. By definition."

Tenten considered this. He often made a lot of sense. It was in his nature to make sense. Absentmindedly she stroked his infinite black hair.

"Maybe you are right," she caved. "It just strikes me as strange sometimes that we've never even flirted with anyone else before."

"We never flirt with each other either," he held against that. Flirting was a concept lost on Neji.

"True," Tenten sighed. Her body was warm to the touch underneath the blanket. As she scooted closer to him, he heard himself asking as if steered externally: "Are you worried?"

She chuckled. "No, not at all." As her lips found his, Neji realized that he was though. An unfamiliar thought entered his mind. Sometimes only time would tell whether something was a problem or not. Like a ticking time bomb. Tenten would never have trouble finding anyone else with her pleasant disposition. For Neji, this was it. There could never be anyone else. Confetti or destruction. Only time would tell.


	4. The End

City hall was bustling with excitement, bursting at its seams from overcrowding. Everyone wanted to catch a glimpse of the beautiful bride and handsome, if slightly gloomy, groom, no pun intended. Sasuke looked like an oil painting, flawless skin, perfectly moulded hair, impeccably dressed. Sakura seemed more like a fairy from a dream. Her white kimono patterned with delicate cherry blossoms fit perfectly with the ringlets of hair escaping her elaborate hairdo. Hinata and Naruto had tears in their eyes. The ceremony had been beautiful. Naruto had almost dropped the rings as he handed them to Sakura and Ino next to Sakura had to stifle a laugh but apart from that it had been nothing but dignified.

Neji and Tenten had been personally invited, but Hiashi had not been so lucky. He played the prestigious card, meaning he was on too many committees to be left out of Konoha's social event of the year. So, Tsunade had ended up inviting him.

But he had grown quite civil over the last four years. He sat in the row behind Tenten, Neji, Hinata and other close friends of the couple and did not complain. As they followed the newlyweds out of city hall the crowd cheered for the war heros. Dignified the procession moved towards the entrance, where cars would be waiting to escort them to the reception. It took them quite a while because Sakura would pause every now and again and speak to children and their families from the school, where she worked. During one of these interruptions, Hiashi leaned forward and said "Beautiful, isn't it? I hope you two are more considerate than Hinata and invite me to yours."

Naruto, who heard, could not contain his laughter. He found Hiashi's jibes entertaining. Hinata suppressed a sigh and kept smiling. Neji and Tenten were not amused at all. Neji looked like he was ready to push Sakura the rest of the path towards the doors.

"I don't think we're ready for that. We're too young," Tenten answered diplomatically while fidgeting with her obi.

"Too young? You're both over thirty. That's ancient in ninja years. There are only two things certain in Konoha - and trust me on this, I've been around long enough - death and taxes. I'd hurry up, if I were you, before it's too late." He meant well but he had never quite managed to eliminate the authoritative tone from his voice.

"I think that's quite enough talk on the topic, father," Hinata involved herself in the conversation.

"I'm just saying, they should be happy they survived as long as they did. In my thirties ninjas were dropping dead like flies. Even Neji is not indestructible." Hiashi had a problematic way of expressing love for his nephew. Hinata hurried to end the subject once and for all: "No more death talk," she warned him. "I mean it."

"Don't I miss the days when you would do as you're told, sometimes."

"Tough luck," she responded, clearly without any regrets of having gotten more assertive over the years.

While father and daughter continued to tease each other lovingly, Neji leaned over and whispered into Tenten's ear. "I don't think I can take a party with him."

Tenten nodded. "I understand. Want to slip away as the others get in the cars?" He nodded, so that's what they did.

Arriving home, Tenten immediately started unwrapping herself from her elaborate dress. Kimonos were not her thing. Neji had had to help her this morning to put it on. She had been absolutely helpless.

"God, I hate that thing," she announced as she stepped out of the puddle of clothing at her feet, leaving Neji to pick up and properly fold the sheer mass of fabric.

"Sorry," he mumbled uncharacteristically. The only other time she had to wear formal dress was when she attended Hyuuga family functions with him. She always went with him, no matter how much she hated it. Neji cast a look at the door through which they had just come. And he had just refused to go to the reception of two of their best friends. He remembered something and pulled out the folded note hidden under the thick cloth. It contained Tenten's prepared toast, now wasted.

Tenten had begun to shower, but even when the water stopped pouring, could Neji not shake the thought of Tenten missing out. Even as she heated up leftovers and gave him dishes to set the table, did he feel unable to rid himself of the sensation; it clung to the inside of his cranium. It remained unchanged even as they were getting ready for bed.

The warm light of their bathroom illuminated her dark skin, making it shimmer like bronze. It struck him that she was so beautiful, it took his breath away. And he was the only one who ever saw it. Day in, day out, she was caged up with him here, only venturing out to meet their well-established long-time friends and work. Never did they meet new people. Presumably she did so when she went on missions, but he wondered whether that was enough. As she was done removing her seldomly worn make-up, she smiled at him and beckoned him to bed. The inviting gesture struck him in the abdomen like a dagger. Incomprehensible how this had never occurred to him before, but now the thought possessed him. He was holding her back, had always done so. She had given him this incredible gift and he had just been gobbling it up all these years.

"I think I'm going to be sick," he stammered. Tenten's face fell.

"Are you okay?" she asked automatically before realizing that it was a stupid question. This was Neji. If he was complaining, he must be close to dying.

"Let me call the doctor," she exclaimed instead and wanted to run downstairs with her bathrobe hanging open.

"Wait," he commanded. He had not used that voice with her in some time. It felt like a blast from the past.

"I think you should go."

"I was just about to when you-", she blundered confusedly.

"No." His voice was firm. The expression on her face grew really worried.

"I think you should leave this apartment."

Her steps grew careful as she first moved towards him, then backwards again.

"What?" she ventured tentatively.

"I think you should leave. And… I want you to listen really well to me."

"Are you dying?" she demanded to know. He was acting as if he was about to explode tearing her and their home into ruins with him.

"Listen!"

Tenten closed her mouth at the urgency of his command.

"You need to start living. And you can't do it in this mausoleum."

Again, Tenten could do nothing more but stare at him, dumbfounded.

"Obviously, I will help you pack and-"

"Pack?!" Tenten could not believe her ears. Frantically she tied the bathrobe around her seductive curves, tighter than would have been necessary.

"You want me to move out because you're dying? Neji, if there's anything wrong with you, I demand you tell me right now. Because I'm not leaving you to die." She said it as if it were the most natural thing in the world. As if she was telling him that rivers flowed downhill.

"Not to die," he corrected. "To live. I want you to live."

She blinked.

"Did your uncle get into your head today or are you really sick? You don't seem well. - You're talking an awful lot."

"I can't marry you," he whispered. Tenten looked unimpressed.

"Neji, I didn't ask for you to marry me. I asked you whether you were sick. Would you mind answering?" She was about two sentences away from calling Tsunade, who was the only trained medical professional she trusted with the mess of a case which was Neji.

"I'm not sick."

"In that case,..." She sighed her relief before continuing in a stricter voice. "I can't say that I'm a huge fan of the tone you're using with me. We're not sixteen anymore and you're not my team leader."

He waved her argument angrily away and sat down on the rim of the bathtub. Tenten remained where she was in their bedroom, just outside.

"I need you to go."

Tenten sighed.

"Fine. Be weird." She gave up. As she returned to the bathroom to slip into something more comfortable, she quickly checked his forehead for a fever. Satisfied that he was not in mortal danger, she grabbed her garments and disappeared. He could hear the door close behind her as she left the apartment. Only after an hour, did she return. Neji was still sitting, still naked, in the exact same place she had left him.

After climbing the steps to their bedroom, she found him there.

"Is your nervous breakdown over?" she asked softly.

"I want to break up," he informed her. He dared not look at her face. He could sense her weight shifting, muscles tensing.

"You need to leave, permanently," he clarified. He knew she was shaking. When he finally had the courage to look at her, he realized she was shaking with anger.

When she spoke, it rumbled through the room like a force of nature.

"We've been together for over ten years."

Neji was unsure why she chose to recite a fact they both knew when it clearly took all her strength to press it out through anger-clenched teeth. Shaking more violently as she continued, her next words were more facts: "Before that, I went five years without ever knowing how you feel." If he had just opened his mouth then. She remembered the caged teenager well. What she said next was not only woven by anger but a streak of desperation creaked in. As if she was trying to convince them both.

"And I know you. I do. Inside and out, up and down."

She steadied her voice. "But some things just can't be known by another person unless you open your mouth and spit them out. So, spit, Neji. For heaven's sake, spit it out!"

He stared at her silently. He couldn't. He just could not. His mouth was sewn shut by his own repression.

Something in his countenance changed her demeanor. All her anger just evaporated as she saw yet another look on his face she had never descried before. _I don't know everything_ , she realized, internally revising her earlier statement. Disheartened, she made her way over to him. The tub's porcelain chill crept into her pelvis as she gently lowered herself next to him;and held his hand. First lightly and probing, then tight and final. That moment, she cried silently. It echoed in his ears. She had never done so before.

It was the scariest moment in both their lives.

 _ttt_

Another one of the companionable silences engulfed them as neither one agreed to budge and remove their hands from the bottle of brandy. It was almost ironically funny because neither one of them liked brandy. She smiled indulgently.

"You know what? You can have the bottle." She let go and continued to work on her glass of red. The beautiful arches connecting Neji's living to his dining room gleamed in the ceiling lights. Neji bathed in the glow of her smile.

After she had left, it had taken her a whole month before she had contacted him. She had not been angry, not at all. Only the long radio silence indicated how hurt she'd been. Still, there was an unbreakable bond between them. It weathered everything. Their friendship was as strong as ever. No one quite understood it, - neither did they, - but they could not fathom life without each other. As friends. So, they still lunched with Hinata and Naruto, still hung out with Lee and Sakura. But the romance part of theirs had been stored away, wrapped up neatly, sealed off. It was somewhere among all these boxes in the space they had shared.

Neji felt showered with an undefinable sensation. He felt just as strange as he had in the first few years of their relationship, overcome with feelings he had no concept of, no names for them. He just weathered them, stoic as always. He pictured Tenten in her new life. Maybe she would get married and have children. There was no way she would not find happiness. Anybody would feel honored to love her, bask in her warmth and enjoy her teasing.

"I should get back to Lee's." She got up to her feet and stretched. She had moved in with their friend.

"The van will be here at 9am for all the boxes," she reminded him unnecessarily and handed him her glass. The image of her leaving to go meet Tsunade after their very first night together flashed before him. He felt the same way now as he had back then.

He took a look around his apartment. It was dead, with all the walls stripped, swallowed by a sea of boxes. He was not sure he could live here anymore. In fact, he was not sure he could live at all anymore. The strangest premonition of him dying on the next mission overcame him, perhaps kamikaze-style.

Her light-footed steps were turned towards the door. One opening, one opening was perhaps all he needed because, suddenly, an alien thought invaded him. It occurred to him there was more than one way of letting a person know you. One that did not include spitting out the words as she had demanded.

She paused to put on her shoes. This was it. The opening. Panic-stricken, he grabbed the fiercely fought over, now forlorn bottle from the living room and pen and paper. His handwriting was more scribbled than usual as he wrote a single sentence on the wispy piece of paper. He stuck it to the front of the bottle's slender neck and handed it to her, wordlessly, as she turned around to say goodbye.

Tenten seemed surprised. "For me?" she assured herself and accepted the gift graciously. The note was intriguing to her. She turned the bottle to read it. Then her expression disintegrated.

He could see her facial features fall and attempt to reassemble, but they only managed to distort. Into something completely different. A promise of hope, he would have guessed had he been a more sentimental man.

Steadily, her eyes rose. She was open-mouthed and disbelieving, he collected and reserved. They locked gazes.

The End.


End file.
